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Why Is Finding Yourself So Damn Hard?

Why does finding yourself have to be so damn hard? Many of us work so hard to “find ourselves” and yet it seems we are on a never-ending search for understanding. We take trips, go on spiritual retreats, test out a multitude of majors, jobs, and trends all along this journey to finding ourselves. There is a yearning to feel “this is where I belong and this is who I really am” though it always seems just out of reach.

In the past 3 days, I have stumbled upon multiple articles and podcasts talking about my generation. They were specifically talking about how 20-somethings are in their right to cheat, lie, and basically be assh*les all because they are “finding themselves.”

Coming from a 20-something-year-old, no it’s not ok. Finding yourself is not an excuse to hurt another.

I do believe that your 20’s is an intense time for learning, growing, and developing into who you really are. Kind of like being a toddler in an adult body. You’ve been here on Earth for a while but now it’s time to learn to walk, to play, to talk. Only this time, as an adult. It’s a weird space to be in being a 20-something year old. You’re not a kid anymore but yet you still look at people 10-15 years older than you as being the “adult” in the room.

I hear it happens again in your 40’s-50’s. When the kids move away or the job just isn’t doing it for ya anymore. You apparently start to reevaluate and you try to remember who YOU were and are. This time without all of the who you are supposed to be for this person and that.

The point is, in each decade of our lives we are reevaluating, growing, and finding ourselves. I don’t think that you will ever truly know who you are for more than the blink of an eye. Time marches on.

What you can do, however, is know when your seasons are changing.

All finding yourself really means is figuring out what’s within you and projecting that outward for your highest good. Meaning, figure out what you love to do, do that, and stop worrying about what other people think. I stepped into who I am when I said “yes” to my mediumship abilities.

I had lied to myself for over 20 years about the things I was experiencing. This, in turn, caused depression, anxiety, and overwhelm. Still, was I actually ready to be compassionate enough to give a good psychic reading at 14 years old? No, I didn’t have the life experience quite yet.

Do you see what I’m getting at here? We need to learn and we need to experience life in all its glory. The good, the bad, the ugly. This helps to awaken us to who we are. The situations in our lives show us who we want to be and who we don’t. From there, we have the ability to change it.

I stepped into being a psychic medium and in that, I found my calling. Next, I started telling my story – my journey. That was the scariest thing I had ever done up to that point. After that, I left my corporate job to become a medium full-time, to teach, and to help others heal.

In each of these seasons I was transforming into someone else, the person I am today. I have found what I’m good at, what I like to do, and where I feel most comfortable. But did I find myself? Sure, I’m right here! All that I am is all that I am today.

It’s not about finding yourself, it’s about stepping into who you already are and letting that person be discovered. Be an outward image of what you feel inside. Don’t hide from yourself and don’t hide from others.

Now, I’m growing through another season.

When I wrote my very first post I was NOT who I am today. I even started this site under an alias from fear of what people would think. Sure, I had stepped into my new life as a developing intuitive and wanted to share that but today I am a coach. Still learning, still growing, but not the same girl that started this site.

It’s bitter sweet to say but I had been feeling that the site was no longer accurately representing me or the messages within. When I was looking around I was seeing a timid little girl just hoping someone would read her story and find a sense of relief.

I don’t mind shouting it from the rooftops now if that means that I get to help heal and in some way positively impact someone’s life. Today I no longer feel like a little girl. I feel like a woman who has grown into someone that accepts and embraces herself in all of her complicated glory.

I’m ready for my site to reflect who I am in this season. So, today, I’m relaunching, rebranding, and becoming more visible. I’m not afraid to be myself anymore and I accept each changing season as it comes.

You’re witnessing my change in seasons right now.

Today I am Ashley Strong, Psychic Medium, 20 something spiritual entrepreneur on a mission to educate others. Educate them on how to step into their purpose, love themselves, and heal their being so that they can experience this beautiful trip to Earth just the same.

Thank you for being a part of this with me!

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